How to choose a
therapist
Finding the right fit
Choosing a therapist can feel like a big decision, especially if you're feeling overwhelmed, unsure, curious or carrying something tender. It's important to find someone who feels safe, warm, and attuned to you. This page offers guidance on choosing a therapist, what to pay attention to, and how to trust your sense of fit. ​
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You don't need to get it perfect.
You just need a place to start.​
Where to Start
Begin with how you feel
As you read therapist profiles or websites, notice your internal response.
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You might ask yourself:
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Do I feel a little more at ease?
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Do I feel understood or 'spoken to'?
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Does this person seem real, not polished and distant?
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You don't need certainty, but a sense of "I could start here" is enough.​​​​​​
It's okay not to know what kind of therapy you need
Many people believe they need to arrive knowing whether they want CBT, psychodynamic therapy, somatic work or something entirely different.
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In reality, most people don't, and don't need to.
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A good therapist helps you explore this together. You're allowed to begin with "I'm not sure what I need, I just know something isn't quite right".
The relationship matters more than the method
Research consistently shows that the quality of the relationship between you and your therapist often matters more than the specific approach they use.
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You might gently check in with yourself:
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Do I feel safe enough to speak honestly?
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Do I feel listened to, not rushed or analysed?
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Can I imagine bringing the difficult or messy parts of myself here?
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If something feels off, you're allowed to trust that.
Practical things matter too
Therapy needs to fit into your real life. It's okay to consider:
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Location and travel (especially across Auckland)
You might think about whether you mind driving, what traffic is like, or whether a quiet drive home might actually give you space to process, and for tears to settle if necessary. -
Fees and availability
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In-person or online sessions
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How easy it is to make contact or ask questions
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These aren't superficial concerns, they affect whether therapy is sustainable and its okay to change your mind.
If you're choosing from a directory
If you're looking through a directory of therapists in Auckland, it can help to:
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Narrow your options to two or three
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Read slowly, rather than endlessly
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Notice who you keep coming back to. If you find yourself returning to this page, you might like to learn a little more about me, or about how therapy with me tends to feel.
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You don't need to compare everyone. More choice doesn't always make things easier.
Its okay to change your mind
Beginning therapy is not a lifelong commitment.
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If, after a few sessions, it doesn't feel like the right fit, you are allowed to say so, or to move on quietly. This isn't a failure. It's part of learning what you need.
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Most therapists understand this, and will support you in finding someone else if needed.
A final word
Therapy isn't about finding the "best" therapist. It's about finding the therapist who is right for you at this point in your life.
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If you're unsure where to begin, that uncertainty itself can be a meaningful place to start.
Call / Text
021 487 462
Location
2A Dodson Ave
Milford
North Shore, Auckland